The thought about "I am lonely"
Five minutes ago, some stupid thoughts just came out to my mind. The thing is that I thought that I'm lonely in this world. Thinking about this almost made my tears bursted out from my eyes. Really, how come did I think that I'm lonely. I still have friends, even my sister now is also in the same country. (Currently I'm studying aboard, not in my hometown. And, 3 months ago, my sister came to this country to take MBA.) So, why the hell did I think that I'm lonely.
Then I observed all the facts that made me think that I'm lonely. They are:
1. Although my sister is in the same country with me, but she stays far from my place. It take 1 hour by shinkansen, plus 45 minutes by bus to her dormitory.
2. I'm not sure if I call my friends, they can come right away to my place. One of my friend is an employee now, she has to wake up early tomorrow to get to her office. And it's already 9 p.m. right now. My best friend from my undergraduate university is having a vacation in her hometown for 1 month. My best friend in my lab has a serious problem right now, that I don't want to make her more depress because of me.My friends from my hometown are younger than me that I'm not sure they can give me advice for my problems, and the others already have family to take care of, so that I think I can't disturb them at this hour.
This facts brought me to a conclusion that I'm lonely in the sense of actual distance that I felt. But if I think more deeply, actually this lonely feeling only something came up from my stupid thoughts. I remember a sentence that my sister told me when I was in a depressing situation, where things just not working as the way it is. She said that I'm not alone. No matter how hard my problem I have here, I still have my family (in my hometown), i. e. my mom, my dad, my sisters and my brother. And also my friends. I mean, although we are separated by distance in space, we still have strong connection in our hearts. After I was told about this, I feel so lucky that I have my sister in this country, so at least I can call her for hours (don't have to think about the phone bill, compare to if I call her in my hometown) and tell her all my problem directly, and get good advice too. Glad to have you here, sis :)
Then I observed all the facts that made me think that I'm lonely. They are:
1. Although my sister is in the same country with me, but she stays far from my place. It take 1 hour by shinkansen, plus 45 minutes by bus to her dormitory.
2. I'm not sure if I call my friends, they can come right away to my place. One of my friend is an employee now, she has to wake up early tomorrow to get to her office. And it's already 9 p.m. right now. My best friend from my undergraduate university is having a vacation in her hometown for 1 month. My best friend in my lab has a serious problem right now, that I don't want to make her more depress because of me.My friends from my hometown are younger than me that I'm not sure they can give me advice for my problems, and the others already have family to take care of, so that I think I can't disturb them at this hour.
This facts brought me to a conclusion that I'm lonely in the sense of actual distance that I felt. But if I think more deeply, actually this lonely feeling only something came up from my stupid thoughts. I remember a sentence that my sister told me when I was in a depressing situation, where things just not working as the way it is. She said that I'm not alone. No matter how hard my problem I have here, I still have my family (in my hometown), i. e. my mom, my dad, my sisters and my brother. And also my friends. I mean, although we are separated by distance in space, we still have strong connection in our hearts. After I was told about this, I feel so lucky that I have my sister in this country, so at least I can call her for hours (don't have to think about the phone bill, compare to if I call her in my hometown) and tell her all my problem directly, and get good advice too. Glad to have you here, sis :)
posted by studeep at 3:52 AM
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